What I Learned About Life from Video Games

While playing a video game the other day, it struck me that I have learned a lot about life from the various games I have played over the years. I guess I have also learned a lot of useless things as well. I've decided to collect a few of these nuggets of wisdom in one place and share them with you. See if you can guess which game taught me each of these lessons.

1. Avoid nukes. Life is never fun at the receiving end of a nuke.
2. Friends always have their name and rank hanging above them. Enemies are much more cowardly, choosing to hide their identity.
3. Don't worry too much if you are pursued by a ghost. If you eat the right thing, you'll soon be chasing him instead.
4. When you detect a nuclear launch, killing the spotter will prevent the nuke from hitting the ground. Therefore, always ignore the nukes, and concentrate on learning how to kill spotters.
5. Nothing is ever hopeless. Sometimes, a sufficiently entrenched farmer can defeat a battleship.
6. The human body is extremely tough. You can easily detonate two grenades under your feet without killing yourself. The desirable side effect is that you will fly a few dozen feet.
7. Veterans are always tougher than trainees. In fact, Veterans are so tough that they can heal themselves.
8. Green turtles taste good. Red turtles are nasty.
9. Death is not permanent. It only lasts until you hit the fire button.
10. Banana peels can crash vehicles as easily as they can trip people.
11. If you eat right, you'll grow big and strong. Instantly.
12. Digital circuits work whether you apply power to them or not.
13. Creatures unable to speak have no trouble saying their four syllable name.
14. The laws of physics are flawed. Large winged creatures can propel themselves in the vacuum of space by flapping their wings. They can also shriek without the need for air.
15. Although jets only have a limited range, helicopters never need refueling.
16. Bombers actually need extra weight. Some must reduce to half speed after they release the weight of their bombs.
17. Cats can only have 9 lives. I can earn up to 99.
18. Medics make everybody sick. Except, of course, other medics.
19. Life favors the aggressor. The first to attack is most often the winner.
20. Monsters are polite. They wait their turn before attacking.

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